Skip to main content

inside a doubting mind

I have no idea what I want to do with my life. 

 I thought I had it pretty much figured out, but turns out I don't :))). Plans change, interests change, people change. I had a set idea but now I'm not certain and it drives me insane !!!!!

 I am terrified of the future and the unknown. I wish I could know what college I'm going to, what I'm going to do later in life, if everything is going to turn out okay... but I don't know. I can't know. There is no way of me knowing yet.

 The future holds endless possibilities and that is a scary thought. You can be walking on sunshine one minute and fall flat on your butt the next. It stresses me out !! (again with not living in the moment ... ) It brings me anxiety and nervousness.

 I want to be successful. I want to live a long life. I want to make people proud. I want to change someone else's life. There is no guarantee that any of this will happen.

 I try to trust that everything is in God's hands, but its hard when you're impatient, doubtful, and constantly overthinking absolutely everything. I truly do believe that God always knows what he is doing, but even this fact doesn't keep me from worrying. 

 What I need to do is simply accept that there is no way of knowing what comes next. I need to learn to be okay with that. There is nothing I can do to help or prevent the future, so focusing more on the present and what is happening at this very moment is essential. God only knows and time only tells. 

Comments

  1. Olivia's CatastropheFebruary 13, 2017 at 9:06 AM

    It's true, you never know what is going to happen. But the best thing is that you can trust in God. It's hard, but doable. I also think there are things you can do to prepare for the future. It's small steps that help you get there as well. So basically, you can enjoy the present while making the future more certain all the time!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

"dancing past the point of no return"

I do this thing where most of the time I don't care what other people think of me, so I do whatever I want and I say whatever comes into my mind. It can end well, or in regret. Either way, there is no going back. And I'm in the process of learning to LOVE the fact that there is no rewind button. Whatever happens happens, and I'm starting to accept that. Its okay that sometimes I'm an idiot, it's great to be opinionated, and its even better to speak out about how you really feel. There is no going back, so might as well embrace every moment. All of them. The good, the bad, and even the embarrassing.  Ive stopped carrying pieces of my past as a burden because I've recently made the realization that I can't change the past, only how I look at it. Soooooo, Ive decided to start looking at it in the best light possible. I laugh at the moments when my life has screwed me over and I've made dumb mistakes. I've stopped the guilt regarding the words that c...
Post a Comment
Read more

anotha one

Two weeks ago today I embarked on a new journey that is my sixteenth year of life. Very scary, very exciting. I have many hopes for it but I am trying to sail through the year with no expectations. I hope this is the year I figure stuff out. I don't know what kind of "stuff" I'm even talking about ... thats what I need to figure out ;) But I hope by this time next year I have a more transparent mindset when it comes to knowing what I want and knowing what I am doing, as I am extremely indecisive. And I hope this realization doesn't come in the way it would in a cheesy coming of age movie.  On another note I am sixteen years and fourteen days old and already #living. I am a newly licensed driver and driving the road like I own it ;)). jk I drive like a granny I am excited to see what this year brings. Maybe new friends?? new mindsets?? life changing experiences ?? My hope is that the answer is yes to all of the above. And that will also be my answer to anythi...
Post a Comment
Read more

No secrets here ... JK

I overshare. Fact. Everyone and their mother knows everything about me. Anyone can find out what I had for breakfast, my current mood, if I'm on my period ...by asking or simply me telling. No need to say anything for me to tell you my life story ;). I share the small, mostly unimportant details of my life, but the big events going on I keep top secret. I only enjoy others knowing my business to a certain point. This point is hard to get to, as my friends know almost everything about me. But as well as they think they know me... they don't. I keep a lot to myself. I hold it all in. Sometimes I feel like I'll explode because of all the thoughts going through my head , but then I just tell myself "I'm fine I'm fine it's FINE!!!" I am transparent because I choose to be. This is both good and bad. Good: Sharing my thoughts and whatever is on my mind helps me bond with others and connect in ways I wouldn't of thought was possible. In a way, I feel lik...
Post a Comment
Read more